On the day that I had to leave I found out about a job possibility with a psych professor. After waiting through the weekend, I finally got the words that I can start working for him as a temp worker. The irony: The professor was the first person I've met for the very first job that I had applied to. It was the beginning of the summer when I went to see him and was told that I could work for him when the position open up in the fall, but I never heard anything from until the exact day I was planning to leave C'ville. And the way I found out about it was so indirect - It wasn't me who found out about it, it wasn't the professor who contacted me. It was Grace who saw the poster in Gilmer Hall and showed it to me. It was grace, indeed.
It boggles my mind when I think about how I was so close to working for that Professor even back in July. If it wasn't for the Staff Retreat, maybe I could have seen him on that Friday instead of the following Monday got that summer job in time? It seems like I applied too all these different jobs through out the past three months for nothing just to get back to the very first job that I have applied to. Just like the israelites who wandered in the desert for 40 years when they could have crossed it in 11 days. If there was one thing that God wanted me to learn in this past three months, it could be summarized in this verse "I am the LORD, this is my name. I will not give my glory to another, nor my praise to idols."
My initial reaction to this verse was "ok. sounds like a verse that doesn't really mean much that I can skip through." And then on second thought "I guess I have some idols. Pride, perfectionism, dark chocolate..." But this summer/fall God humbled me by showing me the depth of the word "idol" and the ways that my heart has been occupied by this one "idol" that I have. I have to cast it out, but its so hard its almost impossible - and then I realize it is impossible on my own. Only God can do it. And as I stop trying on my own, God intervenes.
I'm still learning how to give up these idols, but what God told me recently was this: God doesn't care what decision I make regarding where to live half as much as He cares about my heart. When my heart truly desire to exalt God as my King, God will do crazy things for me. He could have dug up the whole Hong Kong and put it right next to Charlottesville if He wanted to. Instead of trying to figure out all the 235,159,325 things that this world forces us to figure out for ourselves, just try this: put God first in our hearts.
